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5 Tips to Improve Communication in Your Relationship

You've probably heard it a million times before — communication is important. However, that doesn't mean knowing how to communicate comes easily. In fact, effective communication can be one of the hardest parts of relationships. Relationships take work from both partners to make them run smoothly. When you don't have good communication with your partner, it can lead to conflict, stress, and tension.

A healthy relationship is built on trust, honesty, intimacy, and good communication. If you have been struggling to communicate with your partner, there are easy ways you can improve it.

5 Communication Tips For Couples

1. Talk to Each Other With Respect

Yes, we get frustrated with our partners. They don't always help out with household responsibilities like you wish they would. You can't help but feel frustrated at what they say or do.

As frustrating as they can make us feel, you should always remember that this is the person you are choosing to do life with. They are still a person with feelings and thoughts. When you talk to each other, no matter how angry you are, you should never be disrespectful towards each other. To talk to each other with respect, you should never:

  • Scream at each other

  • Call each other names

  • Belittle or degrade each other

2. Validate Their Feelings

This is something that a lot of people struggle with; we just can't understand why someone feels the way they do. Instead of acknowledging this, our first line of defense is often to undermine and invalidate them for what they are feeling. "I don't understand why you feel that way." "I didn't make you feel that way..." 

It may be hard to understand their side at first, but you should always validate their feelings and thoughts. Some easy ways to do this are by:

  • Acknowledging them by saying things like, "I understand."

  • Repeat back what they say when it is your turn

3. Take Turns to Speak

This goes along with the last bullet point. You should take turns speaking to one another. If your partner is talking, try not to interrupt them as much as possible. Of course, you should interject occasionally with an acknowledgment or to ask a question. Ensuring you are taking turns to talk will help prevent the conversation from becoming a shouting match.

You both want to be seen and heard by the other person. Taking turns to speak will help you take great strides in reaching that goal.

4. Agree to Disagree

How many arguments have you gotten into over something you don't see eye to eye on? Let's face it: we all do this. We believe that if we just keep expressing our opinion, the other person will change their mind. And sure, this likely does happen as you discuss things you have differing opinions on, like politics.

We can disagree on a lot in life, so sometimes it's best just to let it be and agree to disagree. There's nothing wrong with having a different opinion than your partner. But, if a subject matter gets either of you heated or upset, it's best to leave that locked away in a box.

5. Counseling

If you are winding up in the same arguments with your partner, it may be a sign that deeper things are happening between you. It could be that somewhere along the line, you have lost the ability to communicate effectively.

Whether you want to work on your communication skills or work out issues that are going on, couples therapy can be the right asset for you. Together, we can help you get to the root cause of what is causing tension in your relationship and find ways to repair your bond. Reach out when you are ready.