True Betrayal? Examining the Impact of Online Infidelity

If you hear the word infidelity, what comes to your mind first?

If it's someone physically cheating, then you are like most other people. Infidelity has become synonymous with love affairs and a cheating partner. Would it be surprising to hear that physical cheating isn't the only form of adultery?

Infidelity of any kind can be damaging to relationships or marriages. It is often seen as the greatest betrayal.

We live in a digital age, and social media often blurs the line between what is considered cheating and what is not.

Online Infidelity: Is It An Actual Betrayal?

Let's start off with the basic idea of what infidelity is. It's an act of unfaithfulness of any kind that is occurring. This includes physical, emotional, and online infidelity.

Take this next part with a grain of salt. There is no single definition of what is considered online infidelity. It's difficult to define because no two couples will look at infidelity similarly.

Some people will view infidelity as something as simple as regularly hanging out with someone who is not their partner. Others will only view infidelity as limited to physical touch or emotional connection with someone else deeply and profoundly.

When it comes to online infidelity, one person might view infidelity as viewing or sending sexually explicit content online. While yet another person will see online cheating as keeping someone they talk to online a secret.

How Does Infidelity Impact Relationships?

As you can see above, the list of what constitutes online infidelity is widely varied. Regardless of its definition, it can have very negative and real consequences on a relationship. Here are just a few.

Impacts Trust

Trust is one of the strongest foundations for making a relationship work. Without it, there will be tension and conflict at every turn. After infidelity occurs, it puts a crack in the foundation of the relationship.

It makes the other partner question everything about their relationship.

"How long has this been going on?"

"What else are they hiding?"

"Did they physically cheat on me, too?"

Intimacy Issues

In the aftermath of infidelity, it makes being intimate with your partner or spouse again really challenging. Whether that is because of online or physical cheating, it makes the partner who was cheated on question their desirability in the bedroom.

It's not easy to feel comfortable with your partner again when feeling the ultimate betrayal.

More Conflict and Tension

If things weren't tense before someone cheated, they sure would be afterward. Even cases of online cheating can cause couples to do nothing but argue and be in a state of constant conflict. Couples will often find themselves arguing about the act of infidelity and everything else under the sun, too.

Dealing With The Aftermath of Online Infidelity

Your partner betrayed you and made a connection with someone else online. Now what?

Even if they apologize to you and you are trying to make things work, it can be challenging to try and pick up the pieces after the act of unfaithfulness has occurred. Infidelity, of any form, does not automatically spell out the end of the relationship, however.

It will take time and effort for both partners to move past this experience. There will be a lot of hard conversations to have in honest ways that you didn't think would be possible.

If you are the partner who cheated, know that saying sorry won't magically fix things. If you are the partner who was cheated on, give yourself the space you need to process your emotions. Give yourself the space you need to feel angry and hurt by your partner's actions.

If you are both willing to try and make things work, don't hesitate to contact us for couples therapy.